It's a wonderful Life

When I was young, my parents were always fighting. Not only did it involved the yelling of vulgarities, there was often throwing of cups and such, that woke my bro and I in the middle of the night. They had an unhappy marriage.

In primary school, I was a very quiet student. I didn’t have that many friends, and those whom I claimed as friends, sometimes made use of me and didn’t treat me very well.

When I went to secondary school, I decided to speak up a little more but I still had a lot of problems with friends. I was in the school band, and being a very weak player, I was often looked down by certain seniors. Some of them were sarcastic, some of them didn’t bother teaching me totally. But there were a few that were nice and encouraging.

I didn’t do that well for my ‘O’ Levels. At least, my grades weren’t good enough to get me into the course that I wanted in TP. So I started working and re-took my ‘O’s as a private candidate. In terms of time, I wasted one year.

I started seeing a guy 9 years older than me when I was 16, and stuck with him for 7 years. He was controlling and possessive and restricted my movements almost totally.

When I was in poly, I didn’t do my best all the time. I skipped many lectures and tutorials as allowed but I put in my best for the exams.

I didn’t allow myself to slack when I got into uni. Apart from the exorbitant school fees, I finally understood the value of studying.

My father passed away last year. It was a very painful experience.

After graduation, I was switching jobs every year. Somehow the companies that I wanted to work for never hired me.


When I look back into my life, I wonder if there were regrets. I wonder if things would have been different and would I have want it that way.

A friend that knows me quite well told me that I had a harsh childhood. But it was my childhood that made me the person I am today. It was my parents’ constant fighting that made me a stronger person. I had to be strong for my mom and my bro. I learnt that this is not the kind of marriage that I want.

Because I was a teenager suffering from great inferiority complex, I could never do as well as I wanted. But growing out of it made me see the value in myself. No longer do I want to be looked down upon.

I ‘wasted’one year in re-taking my ‘O’s. Actually, it wasn’t a waste. Despite a junior position in a foreign bank, I learnt a great deal and made very good friends. Besides, I did do better the second time, and I realized that all along, my problem was not being able to concentrate fully while studying. If I hadn't spent one more year taking the cambridge exams, I wouldn’t have gotten into the course of my choice and met some wonderful people that I still claim as friends up till today.

No regrets for not attending lectures and tutorials religiously. Fun took place outside school anyway, and I had great company. When I think back, I don’t think fulfilling a 100% attendance would have made me learnt more. Great friendships were bonded during the times outside school, at the local kopitiam, at the arcade or just at another classmate’s house.

Despite his controlling, my first love taught me a lot of things. I wouldn't be the person that I am today without him. I thank him for that.

During my uni days, I was wondering if I should have dropped out halfway cos I was too homesick and my relationship with my then BF was on the rocks. Up till now, I do not regret my decision. I stuck with it all the way, and the knowledge I have gained will now stick to me for life. Even if I had dropped my studies, my relationship with then-BF wouldn’t have stayed unchanged.

The switching of jobs exposed me to certain things that I didn’t know. Weird as it sounds, but one year in each job was really enough. I learnt a great deal and made wonderful friends with each job. And now, I am finally going to work for a firm of my choice.

My only regret is not spending more time with my father. I kept reminding myself that I should, but somehow, I never got the chance to. May he rest in peace.

But my father’s death made me love my mother more. I don’t want to have any regrets when it is her time. I have learnt my lesson.

I guess, sometimes, in life, we would look back now and then, and wonder if things will be different if you have made certain decisions better. If you like things the way they are now, probably it was best that you hadn’t made other decisions then. If you’re unhappy, then learnt from the past mistakes whatsoever, and make yourself happier from now on.

My life philosophy is to try and live simply and be happy. Reason for my constant smiling. Simple as it sounds, but it’s not easy.

Life is so short, just always try to be happy. It’s the only thing you can do for yourself.

Juz keep cleaning ... juz keep cleaning ...

I am too exhausted to post anything.

Cleaning an entire house by yourself is no joke. I took more than 10 hours just to clean the windows. And there are thousand and one other things to do.

Please lend me your hands. I need them.

Finally!!

1) I called up Da Company about my job placement. Apparently, I had cleared the medical side and there was a mis-communication on who was supposed to contact me. So in the end, I waited for a week and nobody contacted me. What the hell. But I've been confirmed to start work in August, and that's wonderful news. I juz dread having to wake up like everyone else now.

2) My new home is done with the renovation. Apart from very minor details that still require some follow-up with my contractor, I would say it's all ready. Of course, I need to clean up the entire place all by myself, as Mr BF needs to work, and I happen to be jobless and I (supposedly) have all the time in the world at the moment.

I used to think mopping the floor is easy. I do it every week at home. It's easy when you have a mop. But when you have to mop an entire area using juz a mere rag along with your pair of hands, it can almost lead to muscle cramps. I was soaking wet from just doing the living and dining area. I could even hear my heart beating. I swear it's equivalent to running 4 km.

But other than that, I'm very glad that at the very least, I have the time to take care of the cleaning. The furniture's coming this Friday and I can't wait!!

Some of you will be receiving my invitation for house-warming soon.

You are expected to bring gifts. If you're unsure wat to buy, please check with me. I have no shame when it comes to household appliances that I can't afford right now.

Or, you can buy me vouchers.

If you really can't think of anything to get me, please give me cash.

Note to annoying creep: If you buy me chinese chess, I swear I will throw them in your face.


3) My photo shoot is over!!

But I'm crossing my fingers on how the photos will turn out. For a start, I look really, really different with make up on. I almost didn't recognise myself in the mirror. No kidding. I seriously have no idea if this is a good thing.

Then, during my outdoor shoot at Desaru, I actually took a pic of myself with my lousy phone cam for the sake of my dear mom, who is annoyed that she didn't get to pick my photoshoot gowns with me. Actually, she wanted to pick for me.

No, I'm not Mommy's little girl. My mom juz wanna get involved with most details of my wedding cos she feels like she is the star too. Apparently, she had requested a gown for herself from the bridal shop for my wedding night. Heh. She's juz vain like that and I love her to bits.

Anyway, I was saying I took a pic of myself, which I thought turned out quite charmingly; I was wearing my favourite gown and the make up was done really well. Until I showed the pics to my mom, and she said, "Wah!! You look like Malay girl leh. And so fat some more. "

Sometimes my mom can be very cruel :S

That Poly Gathering

I felt that Sibeh Sian has misled his readers with all the rubbish he puts on his blog. Therefore, I'm gonna explain why we did the things we did.


Why we decided to dine at Borders Bistro Cafe instead of Burger King or KFC

Not only I hate him, the rest of us hate him. LX has warned me that we are not to adhere to Sibeh Sian's request of dining at BK prior to the gathering. I had suggested going to Fish & Co. or even NYDC but the queues were crazy! It was as if Singaporeans had never eaten Fish or Pasta.

Bistro was the only place without a queue. And the only place with a smoking table. Heh.


Reason why I had to order the pizzas at Bistro

Because all the other main courses did not justify their price for the portion of food served and I do know that LX, upon arrival, would "cry father cry mother" about this. Not that I really care that much, cos I know I can jolly well blame it on Sibeh Sian, and LX would believe me.

But I really wanted to eat pizzas. Heh.


Why we ordered the 10 scoops of ice-cream despite my desire to maintain my weight

Because it is value for money, and it is also part of my evil plan to make my friends look fat so that I'll look slimmer. It's such a simple theory, really.

Heh.

Dark Answers to Dark Secrets Revealed

When I read the answers to Sibeh Sian's dark secrets, I felt indignant towards his readers who are misled. The fact is, if you think he is such a loser based on the answers on his blog, you are wrong. He is worse than that. I shall now give you the actual answers (in yellow) to these questions.

Note to Sibeh Sian: You got yourself into this. Don't blame me.


Question #01: What is your greatest sexual fantasy?
To make love to Barney, the purple dinosaur. I have fettish for anything coloured. Seriously.

Question #02: Who is your greatest sexual fantasy?
Barney of course. Shouldn't it be obvious?!

Question #03: Which is the sexiest part of your body?
My 2-inch erected penis. I think small is sexy. Heh.

Note: Don't ask Adrenaline how come she knows this answer. It's painful for her to recollect the incident.

Question #04: How did it felt when you popped the cherry for the very first time?
You don’t know I virgin, issit? You fucker!!

Question #05: Do you harbor any secret fantasies of your colleagues?
Yes, ALL OF THEM.
Nerd – I spent so much time fantasizing his sweet, white ass in the toilet when I’m taking my daily dumps.
Office Bimbo – I wish she is my secretary so that I can get her to go under the table and blow me whenever.
Ms Tan – I wish she would beckon me to her room after everyone has left the office and ravish me from head to toe on her desk. It would be good if she was wearing stockings.
The Boss – Everytime he walks by, I wish he would gently spank my arse as a sign of come-on.

Question #06: Have you ever slept naked before?
Yes, everyday in fact. Cos I wank before I sleep and by then, I’ll be too tired to clean up or put on my clothes. But I do feel guilty about sleeping naked though. Cos every morning my mom has to wake me up for work, and she would go "Oh, sibeh sian ...." and shakes her head. I think she is rather traumatised.

Question #07: What is the naughtiest thing you have ever said to anyone?
“I want to make love to you and have many babies with you!”
Said this to my school bag which I used during poly.
Said this to Da Goat everytime we meet up.
Said this to my imaginery, very hot wife.


I have more to say, but I am still compiling the list. So this is a little preview for all.

Unrest

The office is now empty.

The movers came yesterday. They took the furniture, the stationery, the files and most importantly, they took the PCs.

My PC.

The one on which i spend most of my time with in the office.

The one on which i posted most of my entries with.

The one that kept me entertained while I was bored.

And it was gone, just like that.

I didn't think it would be difficult to let go. Prior to this, I was looking forward to having everything removed so that I didn't have to keep going to the office and do nothing.

But yesterday, I thought of the things we went through to get this company started. The extra hours I put in everyday after work at the previous company. The running about to source for furniture and office equipment. The establishing of the work procedures and systems.

It has been less than a year since we've started. Thankfully, I didn't pump in any of my cash (becos i didn't have the cash). Otherwise, it would be a lot more painful than this. Contrary to opinions, I was actually pretty upset that we had to cease operations. Seeing the empty place cut a bit of my heart. Really.

On the bright side, I'm on my way to a new beginning. I hope.

Just in case some of you still don't know, I actually do not have confirmation on Da Job yet. There may be complications from my medical check up and up till now, I have not signed the appointment letter as yet.

My mind is in a state of unrest now. Call me out for suppers. I need them.

I am distraught

Refer to this.

Even though I had my suspicions, I still wanted to believe that someone up there is still looking after me.

What the hell.

It's juz a myth. Just like Santa Claus and everything else.

On the positive side, now that I know where Sibeh Sian lives and what he does for a living, it's easier for me to plot against him.

For leaving stupid comments on my blog. For misleading everybody that I am in love with him. For having a loser face. For being a loser.

It feels good just knowing I'll be able to inflict pain on that someone again. *evil grin*

Finally, something to do

I'm sure you guys know how free I am at work. All my friends do. As such, I have been officially appointed as the organiser for an upcoming gathering. For my poly pals.

I have two main groups of poly friends; The Gals and The 猪朋狗友 (The Boyz).

The Gals have been pretty busy with their lives, and we do catch up on gossips occassionally over coffee.

It has been a while, however, since I have last met up with The Boyz. Talking about The Boyz, I must emphasize that we have a very special bond that was formed during our internship program at our very expensive and beautiful airport. Each of us has our own role to play, which is what made this group really special and our companionship for each other, delightful. Let me introduce to you who this group comprises of:


LX - The Sex God.

He, who knows all about The Kama Sutra, pornography in any form, and which Lorong to find the hottest chicks (pun intended) in Geylang.



Da Goat

He, who never answers a question with an appropriate answer.

E.g.

"Eh, so how did your exams go?"

"Eh! The moon is so bright hor!"

"........"



The Doctor

He, who is the coolest and almost the nicest guy in the group. But due to his professionalism, he tries to make analysis out of all the crap we talked about, which only made him even more crappy than the rest of us.

This is his signature pose. Very cool siah.

Alicia, The Ice Princess.

Flawless complexion, beautiful body, captivating personality. It's no wonder she is a man-magnet. Damn, if only she is bi-sexual.

Unfortunately, Alicia, who was also my smoking buddy during internship days, seldom participate in our gatherings now. I believe this is partly due to the fact that none of the boyz has matured since poly graduation and they are still as childish as ever. Who can blame her?

Ah Cock, The Irritant

He, who not only craps out of his ass, but out of every opening in his body.

Ah Cock wasn't someone we had initially included in our group. But during our six-months internship program, he had made a lot of contributions, like installing "Puzzle Fighter" in our main PC (we only had 1 pc to use), did all the reports that we didn't want to do, performed well as a pillow for our physical abuse, and most importantly, he proved that he was just as crappy as the rest of us. If not, even more so.

Adrenaline, The Chio

She, although, is as crappy as everyone else, but is also beautiful, intelligent, witty, nice, pleasant to be with .... blah blah blah ... the list goes on.

So you can see, this group is made up of colourful characters which made this group of pals really unique and one in a million.

Some of our "achievements" include:

Polishing our skills in Puzzle Fighter and I am proud to announce that we are all very, very good. At least, I am, still very good up till today. Oh, except for Da Goat, who only won during "kelong" situations.

Digression: Always use Ken when playing puzzle fighter.

Having our 3-times-a-week picnics at the F Gates in the transit area of the airport. The F Gates are especially cosy and made fantastic spots for picnics, ghost-story telling sessions, gossip-about-the-dept-head conferences, and most importantly, our talk-cock seminars. But alas, everything comes at a price, and unfortunately, due to the frequent picnics, I gained a whopping 5 kilos within six months. Fug.

Almost picking up a fight with a male Malay crew from Malaysia Airlines. The bugger, distraught with his unfulfilled (sex) life, tried to find fault with us, and it nearly brewed into a storm as we argued our way into the Duty Terminal Manager's office. Unfortunately for him, no one was on his side. Heh.

Boycotting Ah Cock to enjoy Haagen Diaz ice-cream. During a particular project, we decided not to continue with our research (cos we were lazy), and decided to treat ourselves instead. However, we still needed someone to continue to work just so it appeared that we were all working. Being an irritant, Ah Cock was picked. During our pleasurable activity, Ah Cock was left alone, doing his observation and wondering where the rest of us had gone to.

Sending Ah Cock to walk to the other end of the transit area to do testing for the tele-conferencing machine. It was a long and lonely walk and none of us wanted to do it. Somehow, sending Ah Cock was always, an unanimous decision.

Hiding Ah Cock's school bag on the top dusty cabinet in the staff rest room and made him search for it. Alicia and I had the most fun with this. Before you start feeling sorry for him, please be reminded that he totally deserved it, as he had actually named his bag "How-How". I mean, what the fuck! Who names a bag, and with such a name?!

Scarring Ah Cock. No, it's not as bad as it sounds. You see, this was this one time, where Alicia and I were trying to scare Ah Cock by wanting to put out our cigarette on him. We were kidding of course, but Ah Cock, in a weak attempt to display his "courage" (muahahahahah), swung his fist towards Alicia's cigarette. The cigarette, went out and while Ah Cock acted like it was no big deal, I knew it hurt a lot. Because even years later, he still constantly reminds me of how Alicia and I had scarred him by showing me the mark on his hand.

Come to think of it, a lot of our activities centred around mocking Ah Cock. Too bad for him that he picked the role of an irritant.

Hmm ... irritant .... that sounds so much like a fellow blogger ....

I am so looking forward to the gathering. I think it's gonna be fun :)

...mmm ........ helloo?

You know the way you sound when you just woke up? or better still, awakened by the ringing of your phone?

Yes, that's the one.

I used to think that, that was an embarassing voice. That the callers (my friends) would actually know that I sleep till 12 noon on weekends and awoke only to a ringing phone. I thought I sounded like a cross between a male opera singer and a dying toad.

But the odd thing is my (male) callers have actually commented that, my just-awakened voice is actually very sexy. Especially when I would do a lazy stretch as I "mmmm ......." into the phone.

I don't suppose it applies to be me only; guess it's the same for all ladies out there.

However, i would like to find out if this is indeed true. Also, I would like to know if guys actually sound "sexy" as well. Heh.

So leave your numbers. I'll be calling at 3am.



p.s. in case you haven't realised, I have absolutely nothing better to do at during this period of time.

That friend of mine with a teddy bear

Many of us still have our favourite soft toy or pillow or bolster since young. These cherished items are most usually found on our beds or somewhere within the comfort zone. Such cases are not uncommon.

I was reminded of my friend with the teddy bear, The Psycho, when I was thinking of another friend, Loser, who still keeps a baby pillow since his baby days which he has named "Ling Ling". I don't expect him to come up with anything better since he is a Loser, as per his name.

Anyway, it was the rest of the guys who told me about this. The Psycho, keeps a particular teddy bear on his bed, and accordingly to my sources, there is a torn hole at the bottom of the bear where the vaginal/penis is supposed to be. Just to clarify, the hole didn't come with the bear.

Now, this is very disturbing.

Of course, I wanted more details but all the guys refused to touch the area around the hole to recover any form evidence of abuse performed on the bear, so up till today, we have not given him the benefit of doubt. That is, we choose to believe that he has been using the poor bear as his sexual toy and said bear has been enduring the effects of his charged hormones.

I have heard of blown up dolls that take the form of females for the enjoyment of the less superior gender. I even have a friend who owns one of these (although he claimed that it was a gift and he has not used it before). But tearing a hole in your own teddy bear for such pleasures is simply ........

I can't find the right word for this. Fill in the blank, will you?