Wedding Bells are ringing

I started the day at 6.50am, waking up to the shrill yelling of my alarm clock. Having to drag my lazy arse out of bed in the morning always annoys me.

Why muz I wake up in the morning?

Why can’t I sleep in?

Why muz I go to work?

But today is different. I don’t have to go to work. I juz need to play bridesmaid-cum-errand-girl for the next seven hours. Which is also work actually, except that I don’t have to be in the office.

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It was a lot of fun when we girls made things difficult for Wee Yong, the groom, before we would open the door for him after which he would be able to claim his prize, ie. The Bride. Of course it would have been a lot more fun if Wee Yong’s “brothers” had stood by him and not chickened out during the different challenges.

Initially we were all pissed that the groom arrived almost an hour later than he should have. But on the account of the monies received from the red packet that he gave, we decided to let the case rest.

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One of the challenges that Wee Yong had to undertake was the Q & A. Our questions include:

What is Cheryl’s vital statistics?

What is Cheryl’s favourite position on bed?

Where does Cheryl like you to grab her and why?

What is her favourite phrase when you guys ….. ahem …. ?

Where is the first time you guys did it?

Basically, apart from the first question, Wee Yong got all the answers correct! *applause* And no, I won’t tell you the answers.

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All went well and we ended the customary events as scheduled. The only unfortunate event was my stomach who decided to riot on this joyous occasion, which resulted in a few unpleasant visits to the ladies. My stomach had also decided for me that there would be no alcohol during dinner.

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The bride looked gorgeous as she strode down the aisle with the groom during dinner. There was a lot of laughter and loud talking at our table. Willy and Simon decided to achieve greater heights of goofiness by engaging in crappy conversations involving pole dancing at the dinner table, stroking of each other to further affirm their not-so-heterosexual relationship, and making fun of Mata. Despite all their bullshit, I would have to give them credit for entertaining the rest of us.

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We played some games during dinner to entertain the guests and to test Wee Yong and Cheryl on how well they know each other’s body parts. Just in case you’re thinking dirty, it doesn’t involve any of their private body parts. For one of the games, we blindfolded Wee Yong and after touching the hands of a few girls, he had to guess which hand belonged to Cheryl. The funny part was Cheryl herself, asked the male banquet supervisor to join in as well. Fortunately, Wee Yong could tell that the hand belonged to that of a guy, and he retracted his own hand very quickly. Even though a lot of people were laughing at Wee Yong, I think he secretly enjoyed it. Cos’ before he gave his answer, he actually requested to touch all the girls’ hands again because he “couldn’t remember” the hands that he had touched. Anyway, he got the answer right. And I also secretly think that Cheryl had secretly hinted to him. Yes, they are a very sneaky couple which made them perfect for each other =)

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Being very “thick” guests, we refused to leave even when dinner was over. We had planned a list of games for the happy couple to engage in, but somehow the groom was whisked off to another location after all the other guests left. Disappointed but unwilling to give up, we went up to the bridal suite hoping to wreck havoc and dig out more dirty stories about Cheryl and Wee Yong. Of course that didn’t happen. Cheryl was high, but was still thinking. Damn.

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After some drinks, Mata was requested by all to put up a strip show. He appeared to oblige unwillingly. I’m not sure what the extent of his reluctance is, but he was a really good sport. And I also want to say it’s not an everyday thing to have girls cheering on for Mata to take his clothes off. So, three cheers for Mata!

Juz in case u want to know, I wasn’t sure how good Mata was at the stripping cos I was covering my eyes the whole time. I really don’t need any more traumatizing event to haunt me for the rest of my life.

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Lastly, I just want to wish Wee Yong and Cheryl a lifetime of marital bliss, joy and dirty sex. May the two of you continue your kinky pastime and produce your very own bundle of joy soon.