Monday, March 31, 2008

tHE pERFORMANCE rEVIEW


Every year there is the performance appraisal that people dread ... or love.

It's the time when you bullshit your boss with all your "triumphs" and turn your weaknesses into strengths. I quite enjoy this actually, cos I love making myself look damn good in my job. Heh. Not that I am not, but i welcome praises and compliments anytime. Fyi, I have always been getting good reviews with all my bosses so far and I plan to stay this way.


Problem-solving and decision making

Oh, I am fantastic at this. To resolve the problem of being stuck in traffic jams every morning for 40 min, I made the conscious decision of sleeping in till 8am, then getting out of the house only at 8.50am. Instead of spending 50min per trip, I now spend only 35min getting to the office. Which means, I save 15min everyday. Never mind the fact that i am late for work by 1hr 45min.


Understanding Business

I understand that our business is doing so well ... that almost everyone in the office (globally) got an iPod Touch or iPod Nano ... except me and the rest dealing with this particular group of products that we deal with. Reason being, the money should be put to better use like investing in the opening of a new plant thus generating more jobs for us so that we'll become so important that we're irreplaceable to Da Company.


Coaching and Development

I tried to develop my colleague's social skills by bringing them to Zouk, getting high and playing guessing games. Not that I succeeded, but I've tried nonetheless.


Openness to Change

Instead of ordering the usual lunch box for lunch meetings, I ordered Subway instead.


Interpersonal sensitivity

I don't make fun of fat or ugly people in my team. Only the fat and ugly ones.


=D

6 Comments:

Blogger Green Ogre said...

Hey, that's a funny piece. I'm sure your performance appraisal will be tied to that fantastic 1 year bonus!

10:02 AM  
Blogger Adrenaline said...

who says we get 1 year bonus? only a few months lor. Okay, maybe not a few months, only half a year. plus one more month.

Keke. Don't hit me.

6:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ahahah!!! so funny!!
you good!!

1:21 AM  
Blogger Green Ogre said...

Heh. Why should I hit you? You can go on a nice holiday then and buy like a gallon tank of eucalyptus oil for me. Hehehehe. Thank you!

12:34 PM  
Blogger luving u 4-eva said...

pop by your blog from sian's blog please tell him all his readers miss him.

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12:57 AM  
Blogger imnothere said...

you are beginning to sound like SBS...

*runs for cover*

3:45 AM  

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