Sunday, June 10, 2007


One Wedding and a Funeral



It was a crazy week.

On saturday the 2nd, I had to wake up at 5am after only an hour of sleep. That's because, for the first time, instead of being a 姐妹 at weddings, I was part of the 兄弟 gang and also, the videographer.
I was informed earlier that I had to arrive at the groom's place by 6am, which I did, only to find the groom still in his T-shirt and an underwear. Although, I wished that I had not witnessed that.

Anyway, we proceeded to the groom's mama's place (cos according to traditions, he had to set off from his parents' home) and while the boys got ready, I went to buy coffee and bread for them.

It was a most pathetic sight. We were at the carpark, trying to find a most "glam" manner to eat our breakfast, without much success. So some of us were squatting around and holding up a cup of coffee on one hand with a cigarette in the other while the rest were munching on the pitiful bread. As one of the guys put it, "this is the loser gang ...."

Anyway, we made to the bride's home on time, only to be kept waiting for about half hour. Upon reaching the flat, the boys almost, almost, succeeded in barging into the flat without the use of any angbaos (by use of the little boy who opened the car door as a pawn) although their ploy was ultimately thwarted by the bit of a sister on the hand of one of our brothers. Also, I was being attacked by the brothers during the negotiation of the ang baos because of some "Traitorous" (as the groom put it) comments I made. Well, I was just trying to spice things up; I thought the groom had it pretty easy.

The rest of the day went well, and the weather was fine and we ended the day event at around 1 plus.



As I was seriously exhausted, I was hoping to catch forty winks before making my way down to the dinner. I thought it would be nice to include the bride with her make-up and getting ready in the video. However, after 45 min of nap, I was awakened by Mr BF to make my way down to the hospital. His mom was very ill.

By the time I got to the hospital, Mr BF's mom was already delirious. She couldn't make out who each of us was and seemed to be hallucinating. For the benefit of those who didn't catch my post a few months back, Mr BF's mom was diagnosed with lung cancer (terminal stage) back in late January. She had not been able to go for chemotherapy due to her poor health.

Anyway, I stayed for a while and Mr BF asked me to go ahead to dinner while his sister and him would stay behind. I battled between staying behind and going for dinner. Both are once-in-a-lifetime events. Ultimately, I went for the dinner cos I felt there was nothing I could do for his mom even if I was there. But i could do something for my buddy's wedding.

The dinner went on well; the food was great and despite some hiccups, everything ran smoothly. We went up to the bridal room after that and viewed the video of the morning event. The night ended up with lots of laughs.

On Sunday, after enough rest, Mr BF and I made my way down to the hospital to visit his mom. Her conditioned had worsened overnight. In fact, she was in so much pain that she bit her own tongue. Although we could no longer understand what she was saying, we could tell she was in great pain and to make her condition worse, the doctor had given instructions not to allow any water. This was because there was a high chance the water could seep into her lungs which would be fatal. In between her murmuring, I could make out her asking for water. As if that wasn't bad enough, we had to tie her hands to the bed because she had been struggling to push the oxygen mask out of her face. It really saddened me that there was nothing I could do to alleviate her pain.

We left the hospital at 9 plus that night. I made a mental note to finish up all my week's work in one day and to take leave from Tuesday onwards, so that at least one of us could be with her all the time.

But she couldn't wait.

Mr Bf's mom passed away the next morning at 10.47am.

It was most heart-breaking. As the rest of the family members were too distraught to do anything, I headstart in the funeral arrangements, from finding the undertaker (i went back to the same undertaker who took care of my father's funeral) to packing up all her stuff and food and such. It was most tiring. I almost didn't have the time to feel sad. Except when I was packing her clothes.

So the whole of last week was spent at the funeral, and the after-funeral arrangements.

My energy has been totally sapped by the end of the week.

But in a way, we have finally found closure. I hope.

10 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Oh dear. That is not good news at all. The death of a family member is never easy to take and especially with one so close. Hope that Mr BF is coping well.

Do remember to rest well amidst all the arrangements. Take care, girl.

11:37 PM  
Blogger Green Ogre said...

My condolences again. I really appreciate you finding time to help me with the wedding despite all your own affairs needing energy from you.

You're a traitorous but muchly appreciated brother, just for being there. i'm sorry that I wasn't there for you as well.

11:43 AM  
Blogger Sibeh Sian said...

Oh man, do take care girl.... I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you too :(....

(Anyway I hate to say this, but they say that when a girl joins the brother gang, she will be jinxed with lum pa chee or something!)

9:51 PM  
Blogger nadnut said...

my condolences. *hugs*

10:33 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Sorry to hear about the passing of your MIL. Hope the closure helps to ease the pain. Take care of your health.

10:43 AM  
Blogger imnothere said...

sorry to hear

2:58 PM  
Blogger Adrenaline said...

ensui: yeah, i will, thanks.

ogre: no worries; was glad that i could be there for you guys.

sian: yah, u should be sorry. And im gonna make you very sorry with that stupid lame joke.

nadnut, gracie & imnothere: thank you.

11:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi.. it's me.. the anonymously anonymous fella.

Didn't get much chance to talk to u when i was back to the smoking wonder wonderland.. but do appreciate the many ciggies u provide..

hope both u and Mr. BF are doing alright with his mum's death now.

seeya in a few months timeeeee

1:59 AM  
Blogger Adrenaline said...

mr anonymously anonymous: i know. i was hoping we could get to tok. but unfortunately, we couldn't juz leave the gp like u and sk did .... if not, very weird lah. hahah ... see u soon.

9:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

just read this post. my condolences here.

4:58 PM  

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